"Just a mum"

It's almost a year since I gave up my full time chef job to stay at home with the kids, and I've never looked back.  Yes, I've had the kids tell their friends "My mum doesn't work", and I've had people refer to me as a "lady of leisure", but I wouldn't change my situation for the world. I'm very lucky to be in a position where I CAN stay at home and take care of my house and kids all day, and I love it!

It took me a long time to make my peace with the whole stay at home mum thing, in the past, I always felt as if I was a slacker if I didn't do all of the cooking, cleaning, childcare, budgeting, shopping etc, AND hold down a job. 

Since my kids were born, I've had full time jobs, part time jobs and working from home jobs, yet I could never settle in any of them, because really, all I ever wanted to do was be "just a mum".

At the end of the day, it's true what they say - you can have it all, just not all at the same time. No matter what we choose, or what we have to do, sacrifices always have to be made. If we stay at home, then money might be tighter than if we had a second income. If we have a job on top of being a mum, we have less time to spend with the kids, and we feel like every spare moment has to be spent catching up on housework.

There's no right or wrong way, just what we can be happy with. Some of us have no choice - certainly I've had times in my life where I've absolutely had to be earning a wage. Some of us would like to work, but it wouldn't make financial sense, by the time we've paid childcare, travel and clothing costs, it's actually cheaper to stay at home.

Some of us would go absolutely bonkers at home and need to work for our own sanity, and some, like me, just genuinely love being at home and are lucky enough that we are able to do so.

Really, there should be no judgement from anybody, being a mum is a tough enough job without us all feeling like we're being judged by each other!

I still have days where I stress myself out, especially if my husband is having a particularly busy time at work, I'll feel a bit guilty that I've spent the day crocheting, playing games and baking cakes. I need to constantly remind myself that it's just as much of a job to take care of the house and kids, and that nobody apart from me is putting any pressure on me to prove myself.

I will always be grateful for my ability to do this most rewarding of jobs. We have made it work perfectly - Steve never expects me to do absolutely everything and always just jumps in and helps out when he gets home. Financially, we cope on one wage just fine - we choose camping trips over far flung destinations, sale clothes over designer, picnics over restaurant meals, and we love our little life. I never feel like I'm a kept woman or that I'm sponging off him, we are a team and that's exactly how it should be.

How do you feel about staying at home with the kids? I'd love to hear your opinions!