Tuesday 1 July 2014

Seven signs of ageing? Ha! I'll give you 22...


Okay, so at 34, I know I'm not "old" by any means, but here are some signs I've noticed lately that indicate I might no longer be down with the kids (and using the phrase "down with the kids" is one of them)....

1) You no longer listen to Radio One because it's full of bloody noise, and you've never heard of any of these bands anyway....

2) You start listening to Radio Two, because at least you know al the words, and it's "proper music"

3) ....but you reserve the right to be offended when the "Non Stop Oldies" start featuring songs that were released AFTER you were a legal drinking age.

4) You never go out anymore, but on the rare occasion you do go to a pub, the first thing you look for isn't the hot guys, it's somewhere to sit down.

5) If you are on a night out, you find yourself commenting on how many of these kids will catch their death because they aren't wearing a coat.

6) You notice when someone has lovely teeth, and feel the need to tell them.

7) You check the weather forecast before you leave the house, so you know what jacket to wear.

8) ....or whether to hang out washing before you go.

9) You get excited when you realise it's a good drying day.

10) You don't recognise anyone in Heat magazine.

11) You get genuinely shocked by programmes like Geordie Shore, or What Happens in Kavos, and wonder if people actually behave like that in real life.

12) You fall asleep during a movie

13) 8am is classed as a lie in

14) When you look at holidays, you're less bothered about the nightlife and more bothered about the children's facilities.

15) You start planning Christmas in June

16) You buy shoes based on comfort.

17) You find yourself comparing bunions with the old lady at the bus stop.

18) All your favourite bands are now doing reunion shows.

19) The only people your age in your favourite clothes shop are there with their daughters.

20) Your doctor is younger than you.

21)...and so is your child's teacher.

22) Your child announces that you are "Soooo embarrassing"


Actually, I just realised that all of these are actually signs of being a parent, rather than being older! Hey, maybe one day when my kids are teenagers, I'll be all cool and young again....

What about you? Any signs that you aren't down with the kids anymore?

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